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December 20, 2000
This old article is removed from the main website and is now hidden. But you found it!
Ho ho ho. The Master of Chaos is going to give you some holiday cheer!
My mom recently dug up something really special out of the Christmas box. I thought it'd be funny to share it with you all.
I think that most of you will agree that in growing up in the Eighties and Early Nineties, there was one thing that really embodied the spirt of the season.
It wasn't toys or presents.
It wasn't cookies or cakes or gingerbread houses.
And it sure wasn't peace and good will and all of that junk.
In fact, it wasn't anything normally associated with Christmas at all.
It was Nintendo.
If you didn't know by now, Ninjatron loves Nintendo. It's not even video games as a whole so much that it is Nintendo itself that has always ruled over my Christmas. With everything from first discovering video games in the NES days, playing with friends and family, watching parents struggle with the controller while trying to make Mario jump up the stairs, to all of those great SNES must-have games for the holidays like Donkey Kong Country, how can anyone disagree?
And so with that, for the first time ever, I bring to you some vintage 1993 Christmas Nintendo artwork by Little Ninjatron, age 13. I think he has a bright future ahead of him.
Everyone: "Awwwww..." I'm surprised that this is still in such good shape for a piece of paper that's over 7 years old now. It's not a *great* drawing, but it's not bad for a kid who hadn't taken any real lessons at the time. I've probably drawn Mario more times than any other character. Plus, I was (and still am) totally into the whole magical mushroom world that all of the games are famous for. Check out the attention to detail, like the eyes on the bushes and the clouds, the fire works coming from the castle, and the Magic P Wing from SMB 3 making Santa Mario's sleigh fly. Look closer and you'll see a Para Goomba and a Para Troopa wearing little Santa hats, plus Bullet Bill with an elf hat. Even Lakitu, the cloud dwelling Koopa, is dressed in the Christmas Spirt. And jolly old Santa Mario is tossing down boxes of Gameboys and classic Super NES games like Star Fox and Super Mario All Stars. So, it's a little outdated in that respect, but I know a way I can slightly modify this picture to make it relate better to Christmas of 2000. And here it is..
*gasp*! Mario, you can't say that! Then again, after thinking about how Sony's unimpressive over-hyped under produced sub-standard DVD player / mediocre game machine / toaster oven is not going to make it underneath the tree of so many disappointed little youngsters after Sony had been ringing their Pavlov bell at their loyal dogs for so long, I would tend to agree with the opinion that Sony does, indeed, suck. After all, let's face it. If the system were called anything other than "Playstation 2", there would not be nearly as much big fuss over it as there has been this Holiday season. That's more like a movie title, and in which case a more appropriate name would be "Playstation 2: The Revenge of Crappy Games". Besides, one day Santa Mario is going to bring us something better any ways. Blah blah blah Final Fantasy Resident Evil Metal Gear Solid blah blah. Been there, done that. I don't care. I'm a Nintendo mark. I admit it. Nintendo is Christmas. Christmas is Nintendo. Bite me. (Update: Please keep in mind that this was written before the GameCube came out, and now all 3 of those games are getting GameCube versions. Funny how things end up working out.) And in the same spirt of mixing Christmas, Nintendo, and violence, I bring you...
Santa Claus in WWF No Mercy!
Note that some of these creation items will need to be purchased at the SmackDown Mall shopping area first. If any areas are left out, just leave it as the default setting.
Name: SANTA CLAUS
Body: Fat 2, first color.
For moves, give him whatever you want. I gave him the brutal Russian Neck Drop for the front special and the Spinning Torture Rack for the back Special. It's a good idea to give Santa moves that you would otherwise not assign to other created wrestlers. Also give him the Bow pin as a fallen opponent face up special. Use these for the regular taunts and make your own choices for the rest.
Taunt 122
Now go ahead and have fun kicking Santa's bowl-full-of-jelly butt. This is Ninjatron, saying have a great Christmas, Hanukah, Kwanza, or Atheist-kids-get-presents-day. Hey, gimmie a break. It's impossible to be politically correct around the holidays any ways. Why bother? Sayonara.
Tell Ninjatron how much you hate him now at the contact page.
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