September 1st, 2003

Stupid People HATE Ninjatron!

Ninjatron is going to talk about HATE.

Hi! Good to see you. My name is Ninja, and this is my website. Welcome. Blah blah blah. Whatever. Hi! I'm Ninja. Bite me.

I'm here today to have a serious talk about a serious issue that I take very seriously. In fact, I take this serious issue so seriously that you can see just how serious the serious look on my face is in this serious picture of me. Seriously.

I like to make artwork. I use this website so I can show my artwork. Of course, any time someone puts their artwork up on display, they become subject to criticism. That's fine. I welcome such things. I'm not forcing anyone to like what I do, and everyone has the right to say what they think about what they've seen here. In fact, I have always encouraged people to give me feedback, no matter what they have to say. I like it.

What I don't like are the idiots. You know the type. Known for their inability to articulate intelligent thoughts and their disgusting disregard for even the most basic rules of spelling, grammar, punctuation, and capitalization. To say nothing of their lack of manners. Chances are that you've dealt with a few yourself.

Yes, more than a few of these brain dead cyber-trolls have passed through these virtual doors, doing their best to smear their sludge in a laughable attempt at hurting my feelings. Little do they know that they actually serve as a source of comedy. And just as every action has a counteraction, I will have a great time with this special article as I publicly humiliate the scum of the Internet.

The following are real, actual e-mails and guestbook entires that have all been addressed towards me, my artwork, and this website. They are completely 100% unedited and may include harmful chemicals.

Let's begin, shall we?


Someone calling himself "A Shamed man" once wrote:

Your art is a discrace to anything marvel has ever created.....Your Venom Is Terrible and Your Wolverine makes me want to puke evry time i see it..stop now before you ruin another of my favorite charactars from marvel!

Ah yes... because we all know that Marvel has NEVER done ANYTHING to disgrace their characters themselves, and we all need to be worried about what a poor fan artist does, lest Marvel be disgraced off the face of the Earth.

Stop now before I ruin another character, huh? Errr.. no. I seriously doubt that anything I could ever do in an unofficial capacity would be so terrible that it would actually forever ruin something belonging to a huge entity that I'm not even a part of. Idiot.

So, I'm afraid that I'll have to refuse stopping before I ruin another character. In fact, here's some "discrace" for ya right now, punk!

A Smashed man.


Here's a stirring argument from "metal wabbit".

no offesne the artwork sux, and another thin the reason no one wnats ot go on anime sites is cos anime is good to a point , its really cheesy "limited Animation", i suggest you fellas stop watching yu gi oh or pokemon and step up to the matrix website and download teh first aniamted ANAMATRIX epeisode , it explaina how the matrix cam about with teh best 2d and 3d artists out there

Hmm. No "offesne" - the artwork sucks. No one wants to go on anime sites - anime is good to a point. Wow, this guy is all over the place!

These typos are just too much! We've been blessed with the creation of words like "aniamted", "epeisode", and "explaina". Great stuff there. Try actually pronouncing them, it's hilarious!

What the hell is this guy trying to say? Really cheesy "limited Animation"? Who cares? And what in the world is "no one wnats ot go on anime sites" supposed to mean? And what does this have to do with my website? And why the hell should I stop watching Pokémon?

I think I'll let my minion Shawn's follow up speak for itself.

"Hey Dylan, thought I'd post a comment here since it's been a while, and also because I was so highly amused by the comment below mine. Seriously, what the hell is going on there? The sheer lack of spelling and grammar shoots the bottom out of whatever points that person was attempting to make. I'm also curious as to what the ANAmatrix is. Is it something about a girl named Ana? It must be far superior to that "limited" AnIme we all enjoy so much (?!?)."

Yeah, who knows what's going through this wabbit's head. Let's hope that someday, it'll be a couple thousand volts! Right, Pikachu?



"im PaWnChO mother fackle" had this charming entry

your website fockin sucks
why you gotta be so sheisty wit ur pictures dawg
this site is gay and u can take it up the butt mother fackle

I don't even know where to start here. The website sucks. And not only does it suck, but it "fockin sucks". No reason why, of course, it just does. Ok. I'm "sheisty" with my pictures, whatever that means. I suppose he's talking about my stance on preventing people from using my pictures. Why I "gotta be so sheisty"? Because their MY pictures. Dawg.

And apparently he thinks that this website is gay. Not that there's anything wrong with being gay, but geeze, did this guy just not pay attention to all the cute girls around here? You know, the ones that I drew?

Here, "PaWnChO", you can fockin take THIS up the butt mother fackle.

Cyan kicks butt mother fackle


This one takes the cake. "ryan" had this to say.

ok first of all i am and artist and looking at your art, you made me want to quit, i know not all people are good at art but you suck exceptionally well. your characters have huge gross overproprtions and terrible lay out. i feel my 7 year old cousin could draw better then you with her handicapped foot. if you want to see some real anime e-mail me and ill teach you a thing or two. just because you do alot of it doesnt make you good, in fact it tends to give a people a good chance to look at alot of crap. why waste your time and continue if your art is going to continue down the road to "suck-ass-ville" have a nice day mogaloid...

Yes indeed, this here "mogaloid" surely is having a nice day. Thanks. Jackass.

Now this one almost hurt. Almost. I really don't understand why anyone who looks at art that sucks "exceptionally well" (?) would want to quit. That's some really screwed up logic. Why waste my time and continue? Why does anyone waste their time doing anything? Or is everyone but me blessed with the same supreme talents that "ryan" claims to posses?

Oh wait, he says that if I e-mail him, he'll show me some REAL anime and teach me a thing or two. Great!

Except that despite this kind invitiation, that can't happen! In place of an actual e-mail address, he put "not gonna give it cause your".

So, we have someone who out-and-out bashes my artwork, insults me personally, hypes up his own abilities at my expense, tells me to e-mail him so he can show me how awesome he is, then doesn't leave a real e-mail address. Where I come from, we've got a name for people like that. COWARDS.

I can say with a lot of certainty that, no matter how good this "ryan" is, he'll NEVER last long as a professional artist with that overblown ego and tactless attitude of his. So in that spirit, I went to my drawing studio here in "suck-ass-ville" and drew a nice anime robot picture just for "ryan"! I think it really captures the essence of this situation.

ryan is fryin'


And now it's really getting personal. "samurai_blade_60", who is apparently a former student of mine, became disgruntled with his lack of talent and decided to take it out on me via e-mail. Of course, he didn't leave his name, so I don't know who he really is. Which means to me that he doesn't have the guts to stand by his own statements. Feast your eyes on this.

i dont really your art you rely to much on style pluse you think your japanese but your not first of all its good you shaved your head bald but you think that makes you a monk. any if you taught more about the anime structure then every one would be good at it. but you think oh they'll learn how to draw anime the first class. then you tell us yo draw chibi's thats cool and all but how the heck do you draw a chibi in perspective and you should teach the class how to draw male and female anime character but comic book masters only focus's on male. and last but not least teach hte class how to draw muscles.PS: your the GAIJIN!!!!

Wow, can somebody please buy this guy some punctuation? That's one of the most disjointed, pathetic attempts at a paragraph that I've ever had the misfortune to read. Unless you're a student of mine, or where at one point, this might not make a whole lot of sense to you. But I think that the idiocy of this clown is pretty damn funny regardless.

Here's my point by point response.

Stupid samurai

>i dont really your art

See that? He dont really my art! How crushing.

Uhhh... I think what he's trying to say here is that he doesn't really like my art. He's well within his right to think so if that is the case. Of course, it probably would have helped his case if he actually said so!

>you rely to much on style

Really. I see. "rely" on style as opposed to... what? Have we got some kind of expert here?

>pluse you think your japanese but your not

I do? Since when? How does he know I think I'm Japanese? How does he know that I'm really not Japanese?

I'm Canadian. I'm very proud to be Canadian. And, I love Japan. I'm allowed to love Japan. I am who I am and I make no apologies for it.

Heh heh, "pluse".

>first of all its good you shaved your head bald

I'm glad he approves. I like it too. So do lots of girls. Lucky me.

>but you think that makes you a monk.

I do? Since when? How does he know I think it makes me a monk? How does he know that I'm not a monk?

>any if you taught more about the anime structure

The anime structure? What the hell is that? Is that anything like body construction? If so, then I did teach that. It was in Round 1 Lesson 2. And I hammer it home in almost each and every lesson afterwards. But that is a basic drawing skill, and if I were to teach nothing but basic drawing skills, then we wouldn't have enough time to actually draw anime!

>then every one would be good at it.

Uh, actually, no. Not quite. Everyone won't necessarily be good at it. It doesn't matter how much I teach. No one will be good at it unless they actually listen to what I have to say, use it as best as they can, and PRACTICE. Each and every day. That is something that all artists need to work on for years and years until they've mastered it. This little twerp just wants to get good at drawing right away. Well let me tell ya, it don't work like that, son.

>but you think oh they'll learn how to draw anime the first class.

The first class is drawing anime faces. And yes, that's what people learn how to do. If they do it well or if they do it poorly is a matter of their individual talents and abilities, but regardless of that, by the end of the class, they'll know HOW to do it. Of course, I'll certainly be there to help.

>then you tell us yo draw chibi's thats cool and all

Draw chibi's what? And who is chibi?

Oh! You mean CHIBIS not CHIBI'S. Yeah. Chibis are fun. Kids love chibis.

>but how the heck do you draw a chibi in perspective

Uhh.. the same way you draw anything in perspective. Is that so hard to figure out? That's a really bizarre thing to ask.

What really gets to me is that if he really wanted to know this stuff so badly, then why, oh why, didn't he just put up his hand and ask? He knows that I would have helped him. I always ask if anyone has any questions, several times in each lesson as a matter of fact.

>and you should teach the class how to draw male and female anime character

Uhh.. yeah... I do. Round 1 lesson 2 again. I even have a visual explaining the difference.

>but comic book masters only focus's on male.

Well, maybe some of the other teachers are afraid to talk about "boobies". But I, personally, don't mind. Perhaps he chose to ignore the cute anime girls that I use in examples all the time. If that's the case, then I suppose that's his loss.

>and last but not least teach hte class how to draw muscles.

Round 1 lesson 2 again. Looks like somebody was sleeping through that class!

>PS: your the GAIJIN!!!!

That's fantastic. Love you too, sugar.

Seems to me like he's upset that he just can't draw very well, and so he's looking for someone to blame. Well, that's really too bad, but what people like this need to realize is that a teacher can only show you the door. It's up to you to walk through it. A teacher can only show and explain how things are done. It's your responsibility to practice all the time, every day of your life, to get better at those things. And if you're not interested in making those sacrifices, then you have no business being an artist.

But I think it's pretty obvious that this guy has some much bigger problems than learning to draw anime. Perhaps he'd be better served to concentrate his efforts on something a bit more rudimentary, like, oh, I don't know... spelling and grammar!


These two charming guestbook entires appeared on the same day, just after I had dealt with the above e-mail. Coincidence? I doubt it.

First, someone calling himself "a fan" said:

you're a bad at anime

I are "a bad" at anime! A bad! A bad he say! He say I are a bad! Now I are a sad.

Though, I am impressed. The word "you're" was actually spelled right! Sure, the "y" should be capitalized, but still, unbelievable!

But really, how can anyone say that I'm "a bad" at anime? I mean, just look at this amazing drawing that I just did!

I are a good at anime d00dz!

-------------------------------------------------- Smart idiot.

And lastly, an "unknown worker" had this to say.

ur a fag

Huh. "unknown worker". Really. With this obvious lack of intelligence, I doubt that he works anywhere! How old is this guy? Nine?

Come on, you can do better than that. What is this, a playground? Spare me the juvenile insults and save them for school. And while you're at school, pay attention for once, because it's pretty obvious to everybody that you've definitely got a lot to learn!


LOL OMG WTF!!!! And so concludes our showcase of stupidity. What have we learned from all of this?

Well for one thing, if you actually want to tell someone how much you dislike what they do, spare us all from your petty schoolyard insults and actually express your opinion in a well formed and tactful manner. Otherwise, you'll just be branded as a dumb bully with nothing constructive to say, and no one will ever take you seriously.

Next, at least make a decent attempt to spell correctly. For example, the correct English spelling is "you're", not "ur". Now perhaps some of you may believe that the message is the most important thing, and how the message is presented doesn't matter as long as the message gets through. I say that if I were to meet someone who dressed in tattered, dirty clothes, staggered around aimlessly, and slurred, stuttered and mispronounced all of their words while a river of drool dripped down their chin, it wouldn't matter what that person had to say. I'd have no choice but to think of that person as an idiot. And you know what? Most of the time, I'd be right! Now I know that no one is perfect, English isn't the first language for everyone, and sure, mistakes happen sometimes. But for crying out loud, people, you can at least TRY!

And lastly, if you're going to be an idiot and throw your sludge this way, then the bottom line is that you're wasting your time and just adding fuel to the fire. The only thing you'll accomplish at the end of the day is making the rest of the Internet laugh at your mindlessness, because...



Did you get the joke, or did you just get pissed off? Either way, talk about it on the Message Board!

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